Crappy Resilience

For the past week, I’ve been debating whether to share the following story.  It’s not one of those fairy tale, life-is-a-pleasant-adventure-in-Ecuador stories, but it is something that needs to be told because the hard lessons are the ones that we learn from the most.

Last week, while my parents were visiting, we were robbed.  It wasn’t an intense robbery at gunpoint, nor was it a story where we realized the next day that some things were missing.  Almost the moment it happened we realized that a backpack had been taken and yet we were powerless to recover it.  It began with poop being thrown at us, and then the Andean drug that it contained, burundanga (scopolamine), kicked in and made us compliant with any suggestion of those who were robbing us.  First they feigned kindness—pulling out tissues to help us clean off the poop.  But moments later they had whisked away the backpack and left us still half covered with crap.

As soon as I realized what happened, I tried to chase them down, yelling in Spanish “Thieves!  They stole my backpack!”  I even chased a bus a whole block only to find that they weren’t actually on that bus.  By now the backpack and the camera, jackets, and umbrellas it contained are long gone, but the memory remains.  I didn’t want to forgive them at the time for doing something so despicable.  I didn’t want to trust anyone anymore, and because of the drug they used, all I wanted to do for the rest of the day was cry.

But with time come perspective and the ability to forgive.  And as hard as it is to believe, I also have to admit that God let this happen to us for a reason.  At the same time He protected us from anything worse happening.  The struggle to move on from experiences like this one reminds me time and again that we live by faith.  We live each day with the faith that an earthquake or tornado won’t suddenly destroy our house.  We live by faith that our job will still exist tomorrow and that crops won’t fail to extent that we can’t find food.  Far too often we take these things for granted.  And then every once in a while, the earthquake hits or there is a car accident or someone robs us and our world stands still for a moment.  It’s hard to move on and be optimistic.  Sometimes we need to cry it out and be angry at the world for a while.

But then there comes the time to move on.  We call it resilience—bouncing back from whatever happens.  In reality, it isn’t a quick bounce but instead slow, feeble steps toward solid ground.  Walking down the street again, smiling or making small talk on the bus—these are the very things the worst Thief wants to steal.  But I refuse to let him steal my joy.  As long as God gives me breath on this earth, I’m going to live with joy and will not cave into fear, especially fear of those who cannot touch my soul.  Yes, I’ll be careful and prudent, but Jesus never said that following him would be safe or easy.  He promised us something better—that he will never leave us nor forsake us.  And that’s why I can walk by faith.